Decisions Decisions

Have you ever had a really tough decision to make? Each day, you stumble upon a conflicting conclusion. As the opinions pile in, you feel like a pinball machine – like that metal ball bouncing off the obstacles. I’ve felt like that lately. Between picking out pictures from the photo shoot to taking the 6 incredible songs on my EP and choosing a single, I'm going crazy! We’re less than a month away from releasing the first single and shooting a music video. Selecting 1 song is like choosing a favorite flavor of ice cream & having to eat it for the rest of my life. Not to mention the fact that so much is riding on this decision…like my future, the forward projection of my career, if I’ll “make it” as an artist. Okay, I’ll admit, I’m a bit dramatic. 

I had a completely surreal & once in a lifetime experience a few years ago. I was with a dear friend, Billy Joe Shaver, taking him from appointment to appointment while he was in Nashville promoting his latest record “Everybody’s Brother.” Billy wanted to stop by Cowboy Jack Clement's studio and catch up. When we arrived at the studio, Cowboy was nowhere to be found but through the speakers in his office we heard what sounded like a duet with Johnny Cash. We stood there in silence, just listening. I was completely blown away & wishing I had some internal device to record the moment. A few minutes went by & Cowboy Jack appeared. “Do you remember this, Billy?” Billy did. Long story short, Cowboy had unearthed a reel of forgotten recordings that were tucked away in a closet. They were from a session that Billy and Johnny worked on together years ago. We stood there, song after song, and I felt magically transported back to the 1960’s as we listened to the tracks for the first time since they'd been created. As if that wasn’t cool enough, what struck me most was what Cowboy said next. “I remember recording these & thinking they weren’t good enough.”

It's not that I'm doubting my project - I know it's good enough, it's incredible & I'm in love with it! I just wish I could fast-forward 40 or 50 years and look back at this moment with more clarity. Isn’t it ironic that two of the most brilliant musicians in the world and their producer can dismiss some of their greatest work in the heat of a decision; under the pressure of taking their careers to the next level? I hope they release those recording some day soon. I also hope I can get to a point where I feel undeniably confident about my choice – no regrets. In the grand scheme of me, this is probably just a molehill disguised as a mountain. It could be worse, right? I could accidentally bury the EP in a closet & forget about it. Just kidding! I can guarantee that’s not going to happen!